The Test

Trusting that I will pass the test before me

A brand new chapter has begun in my life and I am so excited and so shocked. The excitement everyone can understand but the shock came from left field. Many people that I thought would be with me marching to the new drummer's beat I found have stayed behind for reasons that I'm just not sure of. If I had to place a bet and trust me I'm not a betting woman, that these people would not be behind me, or beside me and supporting me then I would have lost all of my money. 

To tell the absolute truth I'm shocked and dismayed. I cannot believe that some of my closes and most cherished people have dropped off from my new life and have not embraced me the way that I thought. I would never do that to them. Even if I felt some slight negativity I would be supportive because I know that my Lord is no respecter of person and if He provided for them, He will provide for me. We all have been blessed with talent. We each have our own creativity that is just ours. Mine may not be like yours and yours may not be like mine but we can appreciate what each other has. 

After loosing my baby sister last year I realized that things just had to change. I could not expect something different if all I did was the same old thing in the same old way. I know you can't believe that Radical RevLa could do such a thing. Nevertheless I was right there doing the same old things expecting a different out come. Then just like being hit by lightening God parted his wisdom knowledge into my head and heart. I had to change. Not only did I have to change myself from the inside out but I had to change everything that was about me as well. This led to some very painful times.

I lost friends who had been in my life for so many years only to find out that they were holding me back from a new life. I now see that family members who I knew would always be there for me now have given me a cold shoulder or have just ignored my new joy and my project of love. Yes, it hurts deeply but I'm trying not to be so self-centered. I don't want to make it all about me, however it still cuts deep and I wonder why.

My thoughts are first centered on my own attitude. Have I done something that is offensive? Did I show love or support when those around me that I love had their own moments of joy? Did I show jealousy of any kind and if I did,... did I repent? I would hate to think that I did any of that when my relatives were blessed with their joy. 

Then as I sat and pondered or prayed on these matters I realized that all will not have a heart of joy for my efforts. They will not be happy for me nor supportive. I cannot dwell on them and their attitudes. I must still love them and show support but I cannot allow myself to be dragged down into the crab barrel. I must fight to get out even if its meant that I loose a limb or two. So I walk this new chapter of my life clinging to the hand of my Almighty Father God. I know I'm not all right nor am I all wrong. I'm just a person trying to step into my new place in line and attempting to hold up my end.

I have the right to be happy right now. I have the right to enjoy this phase of my life. I have the right to look at my hard work and take a breath. I have the right to give God the Glory for what He has done so far and look forward to where I'm heading. I know it won't be easy and I also know that there are more hurdles to jump. I'm willing and I won't stop doing what I'm doing. I have a job to do and I'm not ready to stop now. I can only pray for those that I love. I pray that they will get on board and ride this train with me. However if they don't then get out of my way because I'm moving forward. I'm stepping into my next place in line and when this place is over then I will step into the next one.

Now for those who don't know my new place again I share it with you. I have just released my first new fiction novel and it has been a work of love and joy as God has given it to me. I would love for all of you to see the new Radical RevLa...I introduced to you the new me last month but I will bring her to you each month until you get to know her. I introduce you to the now fiction author SaBrowny Rae and her book Backdoor Tales: Tears of the Serpent and September Love. You can find out more about her and read parts of these great stories on our new website at  www.sabrownyraebooks.com

Also enjoy the above new commercial that lets you see the hard work. We so want you to be a part of this new chapter of my new life and pray that you get this book all the buzz has stated that its good and worth investing in. As for those love ones who can not be happy or enjoy the new me...just give it time I'm the same as I was before only now I'm just in a new place in line. Just look I'm there for you loving you as I have always done only now I would like for you to love me as I love you. Trust me you will enjoy the new me better then the old one.

But what can I say...gotta to love me...ha,ha,ha...
no really you do.

Meet RevLa's Big Sister

Its hard being the Big Sister of RevLa

I can't say for sure but I do believe its hard being the oldest sibling in the family. Since I'm second oldest I know how to be a big sister but I still have a sister ahead of me and when I want to I can just defer to her. So what better way to begin 2013 and to continue to honor the black woman then to honor my big sister. Looking back over our childhood I can see just how I could have been a pain to her. I can even see how she had to justify this weird little sister who was always strange and didn't fit in. Now we know it was the anointing of God on my head for the work that I've been called to do, but then it was just downright weird.

Nevertheless my big sister put up with me and loved and protected me even to this day (cause lets face it I'm still marching to the beat of a different drum...ha,ha,ha). So I would love to introduce to you the honored black woman to open out our new year my sister LaVerne Gooding-Jones. Why should she be honored you wondered? Did she invent the cure for cancer? Or did she solve the recession? Was she voted as the first female president? Really what makes this woman so special that she should be honored in my blog?

Let me answer that with just one statement....she's my big sister and she loves me!!! Simple but true. I could go on about all of her many accomplishments. I could tell you what a faith warrior she is and how active she is in her church. I could tell you how people love everything about her. I could tell you how she takes care of our 102 year Grandmother. How she is such a loving and devoted wife, mother, grandmother, great grandmother and a advocate for her extended family. I could tell you about her acting abilities, her lovely singing voice, her poetry, and how she makes the worlds best potato salad. I could go on and on about how smart she is and never had to study a day in her life and still made all "A"s.

However if I did that I would be bragging so I'm just going to say this. I honor her because she is my big sister and even when she is mad at me and want to choke the life out of me and bring me back with CPR she has always loved me and would fight any demon in hell who attempted to bother me. Just that simple. So on this first month in 2013 I crown my big sister with the honor of being one of the most outstanding Black American Women that I have been blessed to know.

Sis I know its hard to be the big sister of Radical RevLa yet you never gave up on me no matter what I attempted to do and in your own way supported my every effort. So I will end this tribute with something that you use to do for me every night I asked you to when I was a child. You would sing my song....I now sing it to you

(In my best Elvis Presley voice)
Wise men say only fools rush in but I can't help falling in love with you!!!
You are so beautiful to me dear sister!!!
And even though you gotta love me...you did it because you wanted to not because God told you that you had to.

I LOVE YOU
 DEAR WOMAN OF GOD
 AND
 MY BIG SISTER!!!
 

What Is A Friend?

Is Someone who loves you for who
you are and go to battle for you
no matter who the enemy is.

At this great vintage age I should not have to wonder the meaning of friendship. Yet I find myself pondering the true meaning of friends. I always thought that if you are a good friend then you should have many good friends. I always felt that if you treat a person the way you want to be treated that they would treat you in that same way. Now I see that my way of thinking must have come from me being dropped from some alien planet or something because in today's world many don't know the true meaning of friendship.

What I love about life is that as long as you live it fully then you will learn something new each and everyday. So with this said after over 19 years with one friend and over 31 years with another I have lost my two closes friends. These two friends I expected to be a part of my life for a lifetime. Now we all understand about friendships for reasons, seasons, and lifetime. As I traveled down the road of life I met and became close to many friends that were in my life for a reason.

That reason could be to help me or for me to help them either way that person was there for a short period of time and then they were gone. With those type of friendships it was great while it lasted but when it was gone it was out of sight out of mind with fond or sometimes not so fond memories. At this great age of 60 I can look and see these various people and smile or frown. I can hear a song that we loved to sing or dance to. I can remember a funny joke that we laughed to. Or I can see a wrong that was done on both party's part. Yet that friendship was needed at the time to enjoy, learn from, or teach.

Then you have friendships that last for a season. Some seasons were longer than the others. You bonded and knew that this was it  you would be friends for life. No distance, no person or no situation could change that bonded friend. You shared many good times, supported each other through many bad, cried on each other's shoulders and laughed at each other's jokes. You spent many days, months, and sometimes years being buddies. Then one day that season was over and it took you by surprise. You had no idea that it was time for it to be over but it just ran its course. It didn't have to end on a bad note nevertheless it did however have to end. Those friendships that end after a long season leave you empty and wondering just what purpose did it serve. Then you get to look at all that you did together and you know that it was sent to develop both of you during that season in your lives.

The season friendship takes awhile in most cases to get over yet one day you realize that its done and cannot be cooked anymore for fear of burning. Something deep just lets you know that its time to move on and so you move and after many months and in most cases many years you move on. You notice that you are standing at the crossroads in life and you must go one way while your season friend has to go another. In many cases this friendship tends to end in a bad way and so you walk away with a bitter taste in your friendship mouth.

Then there is the ultimate friendship and that's the friend for life. This is the one that is always there with you, for you and about you no matter what. You don't have to see each other, or talk to each other but whenever you come together even when its on Facebook everything just begins again as if you never lost a beat. This is the stage of friendship that everyone wants. This is the stage that you ask to be blessed with. You feel after 19 or 31 years that this person is now placed in a lifetime category. You feel that this person is your lifetime buddy. You share all that life has to offer with each other from God to children and then you grow old and share laughs.

In a lifetime friendship you come together on many levels and each level no matter what you have each other's back. You stand and fight for your friend and you correct your friend in love when you see that he/she is going in a negative direction. There is no jealousy, envy, gossiping or wanting the other person to fail. You stand up for your friend and you pray for and with your friend. You never place them in a negative situation and if you did you correct the mistake. A lifetime friend will always stand by you, or cry with you. That friend will be there when nobody else is. That friend will love your good and tolerate your bad yet still be the strong foundation in your life. You may fight and make up but you never stop loving each other.

So here is where my dilemma lines the gray areas of the friend for a season and the friend for a lifetime. You would think a 19-31 year friendship would equate to a lifetime friendship? Well at least I thought so. But that is not always the case. I would have never thought that I would come this far in life and not have my buddies still in my corner. Wanting the best for me as I want for them and cheering me on with the battles of life. Being there with me as I deal with life's difficulties and laughing with me just because. I know that this is what I wanted for them. I know that I have always attempted to be there when they needed me and when they didn't.

I felt that they could count on me and that I would be there to do whatever they asked of me no matter what the sacrifice. Now I see its not to be and while it hurts and sucks I have to put on my big girl baggy pants and deal with it. I have to know that while this is not what I may have wanted that this is what has been put on my table and as I pray for them and wish them well that I must walk on down the road alone. Now don't get me wrong there is always my husband who is my very best friend. Our children who are now adults and are my friends but in a different way. But I'm talking about that girl buddy. That side kick. The one you can tell everything to and it goes no further. That lifetime person who choose to be in your life.

So as I sit here and ponder the friendships of life I am brought to mind that there is only one true friend and He is with you for eternity if you choose Him. Our Lord Jesus has proven that He is that friend who you can put your trust in. He gave up His Life for ours that is a friend beyond a friend. He said He would never leave us or forsake us. Again that is more than a lifetime friend. So while I may be crying over what my take of friendship is I know that I have a true friend in my life. I know that friend loves me for me. I know that friend will never leave me and I know that friend will be waiting for me when this life is over.

So as I look at what is a true friend then all I can do is look to Lord Jesus and that says it all. To my friends who have come and gone may God continue to bless you. May you remember the good and not the bad. May you know deep in your hearts that I still love you and pray over your life each day. That while we were deep in the depths of our friendship that there was no other person that would have your back the way I would.

To the new friends that will come into my life  for whatever reason, season, or the rest of my life....
Welcome!!!

To my Lord Jesus
Oh What a Friend We Have In You!!!     

My Little Big Sister

The lessons learned from a little sister


This year as I continue to recognize the accomplishments of the Black Woman it darned on me that there is a black lady in my life that I must say a word or two about. This wonderful, gifted, talent, and beautiful lady of color is my baby sister Peaches. Being the middle daughter in the group of three girls for the most part I have always talked about my oldest sister. While I take nothing from her because she too is a powerful black lady I just discovered the unique qualities of my baby sister.

We are nine years apart and I have always looked at her as the baby girl. Thus I had to be the leader and the example. But as I now look at my remarkable sister I have learned several lessons from her and have seen qualities in her that make me question myself. You see I'm the Mighty Radical RevLa. Defender of the rights of the female minister. (Ok I'm not all that but you get my drift. How could I learn from my baby sister?)

But God is so good and there is always a lesson to be learned. Being the spiritual leader I thought I had it all together. All the answers. You know I talked the talk and even did the walk (not perfect but pretty good if I say so myself.) As I gave myself a spiritual hug and a pat on the back God just sat me down and opened my eyes. He said "daughter you have a lot to learn and you can begin by observing a true faith warrior." (no really God did say that to me just like that!)

I looked up to see who He was going to show me. I thought surely its going to be Lord Jesus. Then I thought can't be Him I'm not that great that He would use the Son as an example for little old me. It must be someone like David, or Abraham, or Elijah, or maybe Ruth. But to my dismay non of these bible greats came and stood before me. I was bewildered and left at a lost. I sat waiting to see whom He decided to send my way so I could learn how to really walk this faith walk.

Then it happened. This beautiful Black Angel of a woman came into my view. She looked different yet very familar. It was my sister Kimberly aka Peaches. I looked at God and said "Ok Lord you have jokes this is my baby sister"! He then told me to hush and just watch (really He said it just that way). I saw my sister as I've never seen her before. In order for you to understand what a faith "Shero" that she really is let me just tell you a small part of her life.

My baby sister has been diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer with bone and lung involment. She has been told that her life as she has always known it would end soon. She was informed to go home and get her things inorder. That was 10 years ago and her condition has never been in a period of remisson. She refused to hear what the doctors were telling her and would not acknowledge what she saw or felt. She based her life on the Word of God and has never looked back.

When I call to cheer her up she ends up making me smile. She never complains or say's woe is me. She has and is taking care of her children, grandchildren and her home. She is so positive in the word that no matter what they put her through she comes out a winner. We both have predicted that God is going to show the world that He is still in the healing business without a shadow of doubt that He was the one who did it. Even the non-believers will have to state that it was God!

The Mighty Radical RevLa wept and realized that she was not mighty at all. I fell to my knees and prayed for my sister and asked for forgiveness for myself for being so prideful. My baby sister has stated to me that God has not given her a sense of fear, but power, love and a sound mind. This coming from the mouth of the baby! I was and am overwelmed with love and admiration for her. Could I have carried this cross that she faces? I'm ashamed and sad to say I could not!!! I am not all that!

But this truly amazing black woman of faith does it day in and day out and she does not say a negative word. She has never said why me. I yield to her and thank God that she is my sister. I look up to my little/big sister so that she can teach and guide me in the real ways of faith. And I honor her for being the great woman of faith that she is. Being black is not what gives her the faith walk that she has but being black allows me to include her in this year's celebration of the awesomeness of the the black woman of today.

I'm proud of you sis and I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks....ok enough of the chuckles!

Thank you Peaches! I always wondered why Mom gave you that name and not me? Now I see why. You are sweet with a softness but tough exterior and everybody that's arounds you just simply falls in love. Shine on my little sister and keep teaching the world that 
GOD IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE!!!
I LOVE YOU BLACK WOMAN OF CHRIST
TRULY A MODERN DAY FAITH WARRIOR

Thank You for allowing me to share a remarkable Black Lady of Faith with you!

The not so mighty Radical RevLa
But you got to love me....no really you do!

* Just a note on 9/22/12 my sweet little sister went home to heaven to be with our Lord*