Are you living your life or just marking time?

Living life to the fullest is a choice

I just don't know what to do these days. All that's in front of me is brand new and I'm not sure just what I'm suppose to do. Let me explain. Before I retired from my day job I had everything planned out. Each morning I was going to get up just as if I had to go to work. I would do my morning worship and then exercise. I would plan out my meals and place myself on a low calorie diet. I would have several hours of housework and then move to my office and work on my latest novel.

Once that was done I would go out and do a class or swim and then meet a friend for lunch. I would go and visit my granddaughter and my daughter for a short visit. Then return home cook dinner and then take a nap until my husband came home. I would work one day a week at my part-time job and spend quality time with my spouse. Before I retired for the night I would update my blogs, work on promoting and marketing the current book, do some work on the marriage and relationship ministry then take a nice hot bath.

I would go to sleep beside my husband after evening prayers and then wake up and do it all over again. Now I don't know what fairytale I was living in but none of this has happened yet. I'm working two days a week. All I want to do is sleep and stay in my room. Exercise and eating right has become a joke. My husband's job has changed his hours so many times that we don't know if he's working days or nights. My daughter is having another baby and leaning on me to help her with everything. The marriage ministry is growing. My first book is out and marketing and promoting is difficult and my morning worship had been off and on depending on when my husband is up or not.

Nothing has gone according to plans and I'm not living my life I'm just marking time. I must find a way to get a handle on this before I throw in the towel. When I couldn't do it because of work I was so organize. Now that I have plenty of time I just can't seem to manage anything. So I had to stop and look at what's going on with my life. I have got to find a way to live my life in peace and harmony for me. I can't let my husband , daughter, sons, or anyone else disrupt my peace. I didn't retire to lay around like a rock and do nothing. Or the things that I have done to just be in vain.

I must get a handle on the matters that are important to my life and not allow those around me to suck up my new life. So now I must look at myself for all that I'm worth and declare that I'm going to live for me and let no one take away my peace. This is the last week that I let someone else's choices reflect on me. I have been retired for a year as of this month and I have not done anything to break out of this mode.

This month Radical RevLa is going to make a change. As Michael Jackson once sang I'm starting with the man in the mirror. I'm not just asking him to change his ways but I'm saying "RevLa change now or shut your mouth".
Now you know I can't shut my mouth so I guess I have to make that change.

Gotta love me...and I gotta to love me first.

 Buy my new book:
Backdoor Tales: Tears of the Serpent and September Love
By:
SaBrowny Rae
 aka
 Radical RevLa

www.sabrownyraebooks.com