Radical RevLa: The Softer Side Of Man

When a man hurts its felt by all

I noticed something about myself...I tend to feel that man or shall I say men in general don't hurt. While I know this is not true we all do but sometimes to me I get the impression that they are so strong that nothing can hurt them. Maybe its just because a man approaches life in the offensive mode. He just looks at life and the people in his life in a way that will keep them always on the defense. This way he never has to defend himself.


If that is his life's strategy then really its a good one because as a woman I have been defending myself on everything. And honestly its usually a man that has place me in that general direction. The other thing about men they stick together. They never let you see them sweat or allow their buddies to be caught in a way that was not "Manly". While us women will allow each other to sink and then attempt to drown you as you are trying to swim to shore a man won't do that even to his enemy. Once he and his enemy have had words then they are off to bigger and better things.


So when you see a man let go of his control and appear lost and alone it really hurts. It somehow makes the world seem unbalance. I've been seeing it lately with our present economy. Many men who took pride in working hard and caring for their families are now in a state where they have lost their jobs. No matter how hard they try they can't get one or make ends meet. This takes a toll on a man's self esteem. Many of them are now changing roles. They find themselves as the housekeepers, babysitters, stay at home dads. Or they are the ones making the morning coffee and waving good bye at the door as their wives drive off to work.


This is a sad state of affairs. In no way do I want the man to loose his true identity. I've seen men walking around with their heads down and just trying anything to provide. Providing and protecting is a God given instinct for the male as is nurturing and providing care and attention is to a woman. While it makes you blink twice to see men on TV talking about the plight of the Average Man in this present economy it makes my heart hurt to see them break down and cry. Who knew that they could feel and hurt so deeply?


Recently for the first time in over 35 years my husband was laid off for a short period of time. I watched him walking around slightly unsure of himself. He was devastated and really couldn't get a grip of his role. He being a proud and very strong man never depended on anyone to provide for his family. He being a true man of God knew that it was He who would get him through to the next level. But for the first time I saw him hurt. I saw his steady world shaken up. Suddenly his world was not moving in the way he thought it would. He questioned his placement in the family and he was just not sure of what he should do. 


He faced a double whammy. While being very fit and strong able to do the work of men so much younger than he now his age was working against him. He was a man that was always the leader and in charge while at work. Now he was looking for entry level and was so over qualified. He could have retired and enjoyed himself this he never looked at because this was a man who loved to work and take care of his home. He questioned how I looked at him. Face it he is married to me!!! Being who I am could not help his feeling of lost and confusion.


Being the strong woman that I am I was ready to just say enjoy it and rest awhile. You see my husband would never take a vacation unless I forced him. He never missed a day no matter how sick he was. He worked for the same company for 25 years and then moved to another company and was there for 10. This man worked extra and would work side work. He was and is active in our church and ministry and in a gospel singing group. He flat out said that he was not ready to come home and sit. 


While I admired him for being who he is I just about lost it. It took all that I had to keep my big mouth shut. In my spirit all I could yell was "REALLY GOD HE 'S THE ONE WHO WANTS TO WORK....I'M THE ONE WHO WANTS TO COME HOME....AND NOW I HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO WORKKKKKKKKKKKK ....THIS IS NOT FAIRRRRRRRR!!!" I know bad RevLa...very very bad Revla. But guys I didn't say any of this. Nor did I baby him. I hurt so bad looking in his eyes and seeing his world changing and he had no control of it. I told him that it didn't matter. That I loved him with all of my heart and I would do whatever it took to keep things going and whatever he needed me to do I would do....(I know good RevLa for a change....lol).


I gave him a honey-do list that would make your head spin. Finally I could get some of the renovations that I needed done on our home. I also told him that if he needed to just do nothing that was alright with me as well. I keep a straight face when I got up at 5am to get ready for work as he slept. I was grateful for the coffee that he had set to perk when I was ready to walk out the door. I refused to cry and feel sorry for myself because I had to work and still do all the other things including update my blogs. I would not give into the need in me to just go into a depression because I felt everything was so unfair.


I enjoyed coming home and dinner was ready. It felt funny having him talking about what he had done and read or saw on TV. I wanted to just yell and say "be quiet I need a moment" but could see how lonely he was not being use to being at home. I saw a softer side of him that I would have never seen if it was not for this present situation. So I could no longer see him like this. I did the only thing that I knew would work. I decided to "make war on the floor". I got on my knees and asked God to give him his hearts desire. I wanted him to be happy in whatever life had to offer him. So I just thank God for the victory and just kept saying "thank you Lord for my husband's new job".


Then one day I came home and saw him also on his knees. I saw a peace come over him and for the first time since the lay-off I saw him take a deep breath and let it go. He was okay. He had accepted what life had thrown at him and because I took on the role of his wife and supported him (and trust  me for a woman such as I this was difficult) I stayed in my place as ordered by God he was able to deal with what he had been dealt.  He changed before my very eyes and accepted changed. He returned back to the man that he had always been.


Then just like that he was back to work. Happy as ever and now knowing that his true wealth was in his Christ Jesus. If this was to ever happen again he knows that it has nothing to do with who he is. That he is always the King in this castle! 
This incident also changed me because I am seeing men in a different light. It was good for me to see that they do feel and when they do they feel deeply. I was able to hold my tongue and to not wallow in my own self pity. For once I didn't fight against my placement as a helpmate to my husband. For once I was able to go to God with confidence knowing that He would provide my husband what he needed and wanted. While I'm not glad that he had to deal with this but I'm glad that he came through strong and will never look at what the world gives him as his marker for who he is.


Ladies I leave you with this:
While men are arrogant and sometimes hit below the belt this world is really putting them in a place that they have never dealt with before. Its hard out here for us but for some reason I feel we were built to endure the hard things in life. Meaning the hard things that hurt your heart and rip at your soul and then be able to place it in a compartment and keep moving in a forward direction. Men may get on your last nerve but when they are lost and that soft side is expose its sad and it hurts. Trust me I was ready to rip the world a new one when I saw my man suffering. But I also know that he needed this experience so that he could build up his faith and know without a shadow of doubt who was the source of his wealth. We must pray for our men and for our world. We must stand strong for them and fight in the best way we know how and that is to make that "war on the floor" and then pull satan's kingdom down. 


I won't end this post bad. I will just say that as the world changes and things look grim remember that our God can do all things but fail!


Okay that was far too nice....Lord I just have to get this off my chest
Really God....I am the one who wants to come home....can we make this happen?...
Now did you really think I would leave in such a nice way?
Gotta love me
RevLa

Radical Vashti: A Queen Who Chose To Be Deposed Rather Than Disrespected

Queen Vashti refused to come, then the king became furious and burned with anger.

Who is Queen Vashti and why should she be included in our series of radical women? How important could she really be since she was talked about for less than one and a half pages in the book of Esther. For those of us that know the bible we remember the two books in the Old Testament that has a woman as the main character. It is Ruth and Esther. In the book of Esther the focus is on her and the bold move that she took to save God's people the Jews. However before we get to Queen Esther there is another queen that made a bold move that in my opinion showed the ancient world that women were more than just an object to be treated any old kind of way.

Queen Vashti was married to Xerxes the king over Persia from 486 to 465 B.C. The Persians defeated the Babylonians who had captured the Jews and placed them in exile. Now with their defeat and capture the Jewish exiles were transferred to Persia. The capital city of Susa was the setting for the story of Esther under the  reign of King Xerxes I. So our story opens with the King of Persia Xerxes showing off his vast wealth for 180 days. After showing off his wealth he decided to have a party for all of his boys. (Now you must remember this is Radical RevLa's version).

King Xerxes had the best settings for his boys. The best hangings of linen fastened with white and purple materials with silver cords. In other words he brought out all of the good stuff to impress his guys with his wealth. He commanded his wine stewards to serve each man what he wished. They were allowed to drink all that they wanted. The King had their wine served in goblets of gold each different from the others and wine was plentiful the party was in high gear and on the seventh day old King Xerxes was about to take it up a notch.

Visual time: Picture a bunch of ancient rowdy men drinking to their hearts content. All yelling and cursing at the same time. Can you see them now "hey the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire....there's a party over here and there's a party over there...just throw your hands up in the air and wave them like you just don't care...its party time!!!!.....ha,ha,ha nothing like an ancient drunken boy party...OK visual over back to the point.

While all of this partying was going on Queen Vashti also gave a banquet for the women in the royal place. Visual time: The Queen and her ladies sitting around drinking tea...pinkies up in the air. Tea cookies and sandwiches. Dressed to kill latest ancient designer shoes.....ha,ha,ha...I know bad RevLa...but really the ladies were being just that and the men were off the royal chain. By day 7 it all came to a head.

According to the Word it states : "On the seventh day, when King Xerxes was in high spirits from wine, he commanded the seven eunuchs who served him to bring before him Queen Vashti, wearing her royal crown, in order to display her beauty to the people and nobles, for she was lovely to look at."
Translation: These men were beyond drunk...the king was now ready to humiliate the queen. He wanted her to come down naked except for her crown and to display her beauty in front of a room full of drunks. He wanted to let these men without any sense of self-control to see her in the nude. His wife and the queen of his land to be put on display like a common whore.

When the eunuchs came with the kings request the Words tells us this: "but when the attendants delivered the king's command, Queen Vashti refused to come. Then the king became furious and burned with anger."
Sidebar Ladies: Queen Vashti is my kind of woman. She had heard this party going on for days. All this drinking and yelling. Now after seven days of this foolishness the king had the audacity to have some man without genitals to come and command her to come to the hall with who knows how many drunks. Not only was she to come but she the queen was to come nude wearing only a crown. Really...did he really think that anyone would come like that during that time....a roomful of drunks....absolutely no way!!!

So basically Queen Vashti just didn't come. King Xerxes was so amazed that she didn't follow his orders that he didn't know what to do. I mean here we have the conqueror of nations. The bad boy of the ancient world and this Woman had the very nerve not to follow his orders. He was so messed up that he had to call in his experts consults to decide what he could legally do. These men had to put their heads together to figure out what to do with this lady who just was not going  to let a bunch of drunks humiliate her. So these so called great men and leaders of their day came together to decide how to handle Queen Vashti.

You must understand King Xerxes struck fear in the hearts of everyone. What he said was law. You could be killed even if you were his wife and approached him without permission. Now he had been disobeyed by a woman. Who did she think she was??? Not only that Ms. Vashti had set a standard. One that if the other women seen what she did and how she disobeyed they too would follow. According to the word it states: For the queen's conduct will become know to all the women, and so they will despise their husbands and say King Xerxes commanded Queen Vashti to be brought before him, but she would not come. This very day the Persian and Median women of the nobility who have heard about the queen's conduct will respond to all the king's nobles in the same way. There will be no end of disrespect and discord."

The men were afraid that the other women would follow her lead. These ancient men knew that if the women did this they would never be able to control them again. So they came together and decided to stop the women in their tracts before things got out of hand. They told the king that he had to come up with a royal decree and have it written into law that Queen Vashti was never again allowed to be in the presence of the king. Also the king was to give her royal position to someone else who was better than she. Translation: Not a woman who was better but one who would do what she was told even if it meant to come into a room full of drunk men naked!!!

They thought this would make the other women respect the men. RevLa's opinion: I think that secretly the Persian and Median women praised their queen for her stand and dignity. They might not have been able to outright show it but Queen Vashti gave away everything to be her own person. She was not the focus of the book of Esther. She was the lesser queen but to me I feel she too was great. Queen Vashti only held a few pages in the very beginning of the book of Esther. The story was about the Jews and how they were saved via this brave Jewish queen. That's God's greatest story but I see God showing us as ladies another one. 

Vashti shows us that we should never allow our dignity to be taken lightly. We should love ourselves enough that we can give up everything that this material world has to offer without looking back to maintain respect for who we are and who God made us to be. We were created from great stock and God created us as a gift. We are really something and we can not let any man reduce us down to nothing. An ancient pagan woman showed us that in no way should we allow anyone man or woman to disrespect us. Ladies we should never forget Radical Vashti. She gave up what most people would look at as everything but walked away with her self respect. She walked away with her head held high and a place in history as one of the world's greatest woman that ever lived. While I love what Esther did and trust me you will meet Radical Esther we can and should never over look Radical Vashti.

So who is Radical Vashti and why should she be included in our radical women series?
She is just one of the bravest women of her time and ours. To me she is the beginning of the women's movement. She stood for everything that's great in being a woman. She is a great example of love and respect for yourself as a woman. We as ladies of today should take notes from this great lady and never allow any man to compromise us in anyway form or fashion. The other great thing that she showed us is the power we really have. The bravest most vicious men of the ancient world was afraid that a little woman who refused to be placed on display would change the thinking of all the other women and that they would never have control if that happen. Hint, hint ladies can you see our real power and strength??? It dwells within our being. We can make or break the world if we would just trust in our Lord and ourselves but then that's another blog.

Radical Vashti we want you to know that we have not forgotten you. You are not just a one page wonder. You are a true woman of God who when faced with a decision that could cost you your life and your crown you chose to stand up for the dignity and respect of womankind. We thank you for that!!!

Radical Vashti a Queen who chose to be deposed rather than Disrespected!!!

  

Radical Love: What's LOVE Got to do with it?.....Everything!!!

A Woman's heart knows love and its that love that motivates her to walk to a different beat

As we travel on this quest of Radical Love. We arrive at our next problem word.

As we stated in all of the post we suggest that you go back and read each post

in order to obtain the full understanding of where we are coming from.

Our focus with this post is on the trouble word

LOVE

Everyone seems to know what love is. When you ask anyone what is their definition of love

they can come quickly with an answer.

Some say its a deep feeling causing one to act in an amorous way.

Others say that it will cause you to fall and the next thing you know you can't see anything but

the person that caused you to fall in the first place.

We have the dictionary's version of love which states:

A strong positive emotion of regard and affection

A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person

A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection

Is a force that all people have the ability to recognize regardless of religion, culture or personal.

We have the definition from the Word of God

LOVE IS

patient, kind,does not envy, does not boast

is not proud, is not rude, is not self-seeking,

is not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs.

Does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

It never fails!!!

So what does all of this have to do with the woman that has a radical love?

This woman has love as her main motivation.

Without this strong desire led by love she could not take on the job that has been assigned to her.

She knows that she must be patient in order to get her point across. She must walk in kindness because

there will be many who will approach her in a negative way. She does not envy because she knows

who she is and who she represents.

Her walk will prove her worth so she has no need to toot her own horn. She allows others

to speak about her so boasting is not necessary.

She is not proud but has pride in her abilities to do the job at hand.

Many will greet her in rudeness but she will never be rude no matter how they attempt to

cause her to be.

She's is not doing the assignment to promote herself. She honors her call and brings the attention back

to her creator.

She knows that many will attack her to push her into becoming angry. So she knows how

to avoid becoming easily angered.

She has no need to keep records of the wrongs done towards her however she does learn from

the wrong things that has happened.

She knows the truth and that is her delight so rejoicing in evil is not a part of her.

She protects what she knows is right, she trusts in her calling, she has hope in her mission

and she pushes forward with all perseverance.

Most of all She Knows that LOVE IS GOD and He never fails.

Therefore she understands where she has short comings LOVE does not.

A radical woman must love to do the job that she is given. She must possess a

strong positive emotion of regard and affection for God.

She has developed that passionate affection for her Lord that will cause her to stand in the face of

the enemy and not wavier.

She knows that it takes this force that all people have the ability to recognize but very seldom use it

for the purpose of helping mankind.

Many will condemn this woman.

They will look at her and attach many negative motives for why she does what she does.

They will try to cut her down.

Discourage her.

But what they will never know or understand is that this woman

is radical in her love for her mission.

She knows exactly what love is.

Her heart knows who Love is.

Most of all

When asked "so what does love have to do with any of this"?

The radical woman of God will clearly state

"WHY EVERYTHING"



Radical Love: Repeat After Me A Woman Can Not Be A Preacher!!!

Then Jesus said to them, "Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers"

As we continue with the next part of our series Radical Love and the five problem words this post
will focus on the next problem word
Preachers
I ask that you read the first post in this series so you can understand where we are coming from with
this series. Our focus is on radical ladies who are called as leaders to spread
the Word of God as a minister.
In the last blog we focused on our gender. While we are still talking about our gender
we are now looking at the office itself.

Those of us who have been called into the ministry know that its one of the hardest decisions that we
ever had to make. I for one didn't want to do it and attempted to run from my calling.
I didn't want the attention that being a preacher would bring into my life.
Yes I had a very strong belief and faith in God.
I didn't have a problem doing church work. Teaching Sunday school. Writing and directing
church plays. I could jump into the women's ministry and do whatever I was called to do.
But when my Lord called me out of my safe place I must say I hesitated.
Not only did I hesitate. I ran as fast as I could to the hills.
I didn't even pass "Go...nor did I collect my $200 dollars"
I just ran!!!

What a waste of time that was. How can you run away from God?
He didn't beat me into it however His call never stopped.
I knew that I would have to get real with who I proclaim to be.
The problem was that I didn't want to deal with all the negativity.
I kept saying "God if your intentions for my life was to be your spokesperson then why did you
make me a woman???"
His answer was just plain and simple.
"I NEED YOU TO GIVE MY WORD TO MY PEOPLE IN THE WAY THAT ONLY YOU
CAN DO. THERE IS ONLY ONE YOU!!! THE CHOICE IS YOURS."

So I said yes and as soon as I went to my senior pastor I got my first taste of what was to
come.
There was another person and myself that went to our pastor on the same day. We sat
outside of his office waiting our turn to speak to him.
While sitting there we started talking and became very excited because he was telling
me that he had been called to preach. I said me too. He gave me a funny look
but didn't say anything else.
I was on cloud nine. You see I finally excepted the call on my life.
He went in first.
While he was in the pastor's office the first lady (his wife) of the church came and sat down
beside me.

So we started talking. I didn't know at the time that she was sent out to talk to me about what
I was about to convey to her husband.
She asked me what I was going to see pastor about.
Being very naive and excited I started telling her that I had been called by God to be a minister.
She allowed me to talk and talk and talk.
Then she just took my hand and said
"Repeat after me....women should not be preachers and they can not be pastors"
Pulling my hand away I just looked at her. Her eyes had no life in them.
She had a pasted smile on her lips and for the first time she appeared ugly and false to me.
My heart broke and I said nothing. I just sat there waiting my turn.
She soon got the message and got up and went back into her husband's office.

The pastor and the man that was with me came out. He gave first lady a hug and the men
shook hands.
My pastor was saying to him that he would start his minister's class that following Thursday.
The man smiled and turned to leave. He would not look at me. My heart sunk and I knew now
why God had really called me.
I was determined right there and then I was not going to let anyone turn me around. God wanted me
and I said yes. This was no game or joke. I got ready for the fight to come.

That was over 14 years ago. It has been an up hill battle ever since.
God has given me strength and comfort.
I have never looked back over all I had to do to get here. I was made to do 10 times
more than the men and still catching it from men and women alike.
But I have a peace that I know its not my own.
I know that this was what I was created to do.
So who is to say who is and who is not a preacher?

Only God can call you!
And only you and He know that you were called.
He does not look at us in genders. He does not feel that one office is for men only or women only.
A preacher is a person that goes out and proclaims about the gospels of the Lord.
That He is, that He had been and that He is coming back!!!
IT'S THE LORD'S CHOICE AS TO WHOM HE WANTS TO REPRESENT HIM!
I didn't call myself. This is not a job that I would want. I don't like controversy.
However once I said yes and believed in my heart that this was what I was to do
then nobody was going to get in my way.
Not only that I would do it my way using every part of my being.

So I end with this.
If a preacher is one told by Christ to go proclaim or go and tell.
About Him and His coming
then really the very first preachers were two women by the name of Mary.
Don't throw the stones!!!
For those that believe in the bible then I suggest that you read the four gospels
Right now I'm only going to quote from the book of Matthew 28:1-10 is what you can
read however I will be referring to Matthew 28:10
"THEN JESUS SAID TO THEM, DO NOT BE AFRAID, GO AND TELL MY BROTHERS TO
GO TO GALILEE; THERE THEY WILL SEE ME"

Jesus Himself sent those ladies to proclaim to them that He was and is and where to
meet Him.
IS THIS NOT THE ROLE OF A PREACHER TO PROCLAIM THAT HE WAS AND IS
AND WHERE TO MEET HIM.
Lord Jesus gave the first preaching job to the women because they were there.
They wanted to take care of Him.
They saw Him and believed that he was raised from the dead.
They gladly ran and proclaimed Him to His disciples.
So if Lord Jesus gave the first preacher job to the women
who can say that we can not give the Word of God in the office that He gave us?

Who can be a preacher???
ASK JESUS!!!
I REST MY CASE!!!